The last Keanu Reeves movie I saw was JOHNNY MNEMONIC. It was awful. And I loved it. Parts of it were so atrociously ridiculous, they still bring a derisive smile to my face today. With such a film as my most recent measure of Keanu's oeuvre, my expectations for his latest flick, CHAIN REACTION, were nothing less than benthic.

Strangely, CHAIN REACTION disappointed me. It wasn't good enough (even with my low expectations) for me to like it. And it wasn't bad enough for me to embrace it as I've embraced JOHNNY MNEMONIC and THE SPECIALIST -- movies that are so bad they're actually enjoyable. Let me give you an idea of what it's all about.

Keanu is a machinist who works for a lab at the University of Chicago that's studying a low-cost means of separating the hydrogen out of water. Abundant hydrogen, argues the head researcher, can replace fossil fuels and save mankind from pollution, economic distress and perhaps even war. They're pretty close to getting it, too, using lasers to pump a large amount of energy into a tiny volume to produce the dissociating reaction. But the reaction isn't stable or self-sustaining. Keanu stumbles upon certain frequencies of sound waves that could be used in place of lasers. He brings the technique to the lab and voila! abundant hydrogen for everyone.

Of course, research like this does not go unnoticed by larger powers. The night after the discovery, Keanu returns to the lab to find the beloved head researcher murdered and the reactor set to overload. When the reactor blows, 8 square blocks of Chicago's South Side are wiped off the map. The FBI lands at the site and suspicion falls on Keanu and two of the researchers -- mainly due to incriminating evidence planted in their homes by some unknown entity. Keanu hooks up with one of the researchers, Dr. Lily Sinclair (played by Rachel Weisz), and the two decide to run rather than answer questions that might lead to prison.

From that point on, CHAIN REACTION becomes a chase movie -- which isn't surprising given that director Andrew Davis also did THE FUGITIVE. It starts out well enough with Keanu fleeing the police down North Michigan Ave. The drawbridge goes up just as he reaches it and the scene that follows is slightly more original than many "raised drawbridge" scenes. I also liked the scene where Keanu commandeers a fanboat to escape across a frozen lake. Instead of zipping away with Bond-like skill, he spins helplessly for a good while before gaining control of the boat. Unfortunately, the rest of the chase is pretty standard fare. And worse.

I liked the writing, editing and direction at the beginning of CHAIN REACTION. The movie packed a lot of information into details both spoken and visual. Every line conveyed something important. As the movie wore on, though, I realized that the dialogue wasn't really dialogue -- it was exposition. The characters weren't really talking to each other; they were transferring information to the audience.

However, all that information wasn't enough to keep me from being confused when it came to "the bad guys." You see, the bad guys are this shadowy alliance of U.S. intelligence and big business. Their front man is Paul Shannon, played by Morgan Freeman, who happens to oversee the University of Chicago team. It is never made satisfactorily clear what Shannon's job is, what his plan and its motivations are or where Shannon's sympathies really lie. Part of this is to keep us wondering, "Is he on Keanu's side or isn't he?" Part of this is to add complexity to Shannon's character -- which mirrors the theme he expounds to simple, idealistic Keanu: "We live in a complex world." But most of it is just nebulous and unsatisfying.

Also less than satisfying was the lab explosion that flattened Chicago. I didn't find the computer generated images of buildings disintegrating in the shockwave very naturalistic. Instead of steel beams and cinder blocks, the buildings obviously were constructed of two-dimensional polygons that flew apart like index cards. Not convincing to viewers who have seen TWISTER or INDEPENDENCE DAY.

Another thing that bothered me is the easy time of things Keanu has. By many strokes of good luck, he manages to infiltrate this super-secret installation with the simplest of ruses. And then, once inside, the top secret material that exposes the bad guys is literally spread out on the table before him.

And the thugs were totally bestial, like zombie space marines from Doom. And I felt no drama in the scene where Dr. Sinclair gets hypothermia. And her makeup was always perfect. And there's no way they could have held onto that basket when the shockwave hit. And Keanu Reeves can't act. And the goofy things about the frequencies and the disk and the e-mailing the C-Systems files don't make sense.

I could go on all night complaining about CHAIN REACTION. But when you add it all up, it doesn't make for a really *bad* movie -- just a movie that is completely genre-typical and resoundingly *not* good. Now, if you're like any of several women I know who will see anything with Keanu Reeves just to gaze upon his face (and his butt), well, go ahead, but know that he's always fully clothed and never even kisses the girl.

The rest of you should stay home.

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Mike's Midnight Movie Reviews
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